Empowering Spiritual Growth: How to Pray “Correctly”

A Common Dining Dilemma You’re out on a big date with your significant other; you’ve been looking forward to this night for weeks; you carefully selected an elegant restaurant, which you think you’ll both enjoy (after endlessly going back and forth between options!). The somewhat snobby waiter brings out your orders. After pouring yourself a glass of wine, you cut into your filet mignon. To your great disappointment, your steak is well done. You clearly ordered it rare. How do you handle this situation? Three Common Responses to Conflict Many people would pick one of the following three options: 1. Passive Response They say and do nothing. They muddle through chewing their tough-as-leather, overpriced steak and try to make the best of the situation. 2. Passive-Aggressive Response They say nothing but fail to leave a tip for the snobby waiter—knowing it may not be his fault but, hey, they feel a need to deal with the frustration somehow. 3. Aggressive Response They demand to speak to their waiter in a voice loud enough for many other patrons to hear. They embarrass their date by acting in a way not unlike Jack Nicholson in The Shining as he chops through a bathroom door with an ax. Understanding Conflict Styles The above ways of responding to this scenario represent three styles of how people commonly deal with potentially conflictual situations: 1. Passively 2. Passively aggressively 3. Aggressively Many of us feel that the above three styles are our only options in dealing with such things. However, there is another: ASSERTIVELY Why Assertiveness Matters Perhaps the scenario in question represents a first-world problem. However, we all face many situations with others, which play a major role in the quality of our lives. · How do we respond when we feel judged or criticized by a family member? · What’s our reaction when a co-worker speaks to us in a disrespectful manner? · What do we say when a friend keeps asking for money that’s never paid back? The Assertive Approach Assertiveness is responding in a clear, confident, but quiet and non-aggressive manner. Think “walk softly and carry a big stick.” We are respectful and polite to those we are speaking to but know that we need to advocate for ourselves and what is best for us. Here is how one might respond assertively to our original scenario with the leather steak: “Excuse me sir. I’m disappointed with my steak. I ordered it rare, but it is quite well done. I’d appreciate having a fresh one, and some consideration for our meals not being ready at the same time.”  Assertiveness: A Lifelong Skill There is often a learning curve for assertiveness to become second nature. However, it is a skill that, once mastered, will pay dividends for the rest of our lives—especially when what’s at stake is more than just steak!

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The Link Between Multitasking and Mental Health Worldwide rates of depression and anxiety are at all-time highs. There may not be one simple reason we can point to in attempting to explain this. However, there is little doubt that a contributing factor can be summarized by a single word we hear all too often: multitasking. The Myth of Productivity We all have responsibilities that need to be met and multiple demands upon our time. However, many of us attempt to do too much in the mistaken assumption that it makes us more productive. It is important to remember that quantity can adversely affect quality. However, it is not merely a question of productivity that is of concern here. Sleep : A Shocking Statistic In 1960 only 2% of Americans averaged less than 7 hours of sleep nightly. Today that percentage has grown to almost 40%! Adequate sleep is crucial to both physical and emotional well-being. Your brain “sweeps” itself clean of toxins during sleep, so you are literally poisoning yourself by not getting enough! What are we doing differently in today’s world that is causing us to do this to ourselves? Have Demands Really Increased Over Time? Here’s the question: Do people today really have more responsibility and demands on their time as compared to people in 1960? In 1960 my father was a full-time student while working two jobs to pay for his education. I don’t think my father ever suffered a day of depression or excess anxiety in his life. What I’m driving at is that today’s world seems to be cultivating a culture that compulsively engages in more, more and more. How many of the things that we do are truly necessary? Indeed, how many of the things we do are vital in positively impacting the quality of our lives and our emotional well-being? The name of the game here is to learn to simplify our lives wherever possible. Parents : It is O.K. if your child is not participating in 5 different clubs and/or team sports; let them have their down time too. College students : Your resume upon graduation doesn’t need to list achievements in an enormous array of extracurricular activities while maintaining a perfect 4.0 GPA. Everyone : Cut down the internet chatter and block out “technology” free breaks in your daily schedule. Nothing bad will happen if you do this for a couple hours each day to focus all your attention on family, friends, or simple reflection on your own. I would encourage all of us to start looking at where we can cut back on the hectic pace of our lives. Where can we “streamline”? What can we give up? Can we cut back by 30 minutes daily internet screen time, watching TV, or the length of work meetings? The Power of Simplification I realize what I am suggesting goes against the grain of our culture today. However, please do not underestimate the power of learning how to simplify your life.

The new season is a great reason to make and keep resolutions. Whether it’s eating right or cleaning out the garage, here are some tips for making and keeping resolutions.

There are so many good reasons to communicate with site visitors. Tell them about sales and new products or update them with tips and information.